Week's randoms and a reality check

Here are a bunch of randoms for the week all jumbled together...sorry for the randomness of this post!

LOVE these three...

Will only see once in my lifetime...

So much truth to my life and the theme of my reading this week!

 

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***Warning...graphic details below.

Just to be real, I have decided to share something very personal because maybe somebody can relate.  Exactly a year ago,  I found a lump in my breast a week before Christmas.  It was sore and that it how I discovered it.  I was absolutely devastated, heartbroken, scared and all other emotions you could imagine.  We were about to go on a vacation with my parents to Gatlinburg and I didn't want to ruin everybody's vacation so I didn't tell a soul, not even my husband. It was the longest week of my life!

I couldn't quit thinking about it but forced myself to hide it so no one could see it in my face.  I would stay up late after everyone went to bed researching it on the internet and doing everything I could to get as much information as possible.  Finally the day after New Years, the day before we were going to come home, I caved and told Jay late one night through many tears.  We were both so scared and he, as I, was very concerned.  He was so supportive and loving and told me he wanted me to tell my mom (because he obviously knew nothing about breast lumps/cancer). 

The next morning I told my mom and dad and I showed it to my mom.  She eased my fears a little and said it felt like something she had had removed years ago.  She said not to worry it was probably a cyst.  Even at 32 sometimes you still just need your momma to tell you everything is going to be ok.  That made me feel a little better however I was dying to go to the doctor to get an official diagnosis.  I had already scheduled an appointment for when we returned.

 A few days later at my appointment, I had a mammogram and an ultrasound done.  I was surprised to hear the doctor say that it wasn't a cyst.  It was a tumor, however it didn't look malignant.  What a relief!!!  He did tell me he wanted to see me back in 3 months to make sure it hadn't changed or grown.  I went back in March of this year and no change...relief.  Yesterday was my 2nd post diagnosis checkup and I was a little nervous.  I didn't expect bad news but just wanted to hear the doc say for sure.  All was well at the appointment and still it doesn't look malignant.  However I do have a few more of them.  I have asked him if I should have it removed and he said not unless I just want to.  These kind of tumors typically do NOT turn into cancer and that he just wanted to check me every 6 months. 

Sometimes it takes something scary like this for you to realize the things that are truly important in life and that God really does have a plan, whether you think it is good or bad, and all in all HE knows what is best for us.  I was relieved to get good news however I know there are many that don't and my heart literally breaks for them.  I KNOW the emotions they go through (fear, trepidation, anger etc.) and it's hard.  However I do know the ONE who created my every fiber and I TRUST Him with my life, even if it's not what I expect.